Yesterday Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy waxed philosophical (http://www.boston.com/sports/articles/2007/02/20/hit_is_part_of_the_game/) on Tom Brady's baby situation.
He's right that it's socially no big deal anymore for people to bring children into the world without benefit of marriage. And I think he's saying that it's tougher on Brady, because his fame and image bring higher than average expectations for his behavior. All cool.
I do have a couple of quibbles with Shaughnessy, though.
Number one, he says "Brady's fame puts him in the fast-lane world with actresses (like Moynahan) and supermodels (like new squeeze Gisele Bundchen)."
Not quite. It's personal choice that puts Brady in the fast lane. Fame and wealth give him that choice.
Some guys in football live a relatively quiet life; consider Tony Dungy. Some, rather than running around with supermodels, run around saying, "Yay, God!" the way Kurt Warner does.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
It's all a matter of choice among options presented.
Dan, fame doesn't force you to hang with supermodels.
And another thing, Dan: In pondering what it must be like for a man to see his personal life all over the news, you practically get misty. "It has to be embarrassing and violating," you write.
Embarrassing and violating...for the *guy*??? Are you kidding? I mean, maybe so, but how courtly of you. I'm so happy you're taking Brady's feelings into account here, while brushing off the lady's predicament with, "this is not the scandal it would have been 50 years ago."
Oh--wait. You were talking about Brady again there; how it wouldn't ruin his life and he wouldn't have to marry Bridget.
What surprises me here is not the so-what attitude to babies born out of wedlock. I actually agree with it. It's perfectly acceptable in many places, and it's a damn sight better than shaming kids to bastardy.
I'm simply stunned at the lack of consideration exhibited by the media for the women involved.
Gisele is supportive, Bridget isn't really in trouble.
Fine, but do you think either of them is really happy about the situation?
Guys, maybe the problem is the beer ads, which apparently use live women because inflatables are too hard to wrangle on the set. Women are fake-y dolls that are there for the commercial-guys' egos (and other components) and their feelings are not a consideration.
And what about the baby?
Of course, journalism is not about considering people's feelings, and Brady is fairer game in this story than his women.
Kind of fascinating, though, that the press seems to be giving him a pass here. You have to wonder, if it had been Michael Vick... No, that's a musing for another day.
One thing, Brady's people have announced that he's "happy" about the baby. That's a good thing; happiness about babies is always the right answer.
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
This Just In: Quarterbacks Need Good Blocking
The Brady/Bridget situation makes it clear: Team Moms should be dispensing more than Chunky soups.
How about a little advice for the guys in the locker room?
I'll take the role of unofficial Sports Auntie and say what has to be said: Protection is important.
D'oh! Hey, guys: What's your protection scheme?
I suppose money is pretty decent as a form of birth control, if what you want is to make sure that moms and children are materially well cared for. Pro athletes are spawning kids all over the place and don't have to give a care so long as the right people are paid the right amount.
Then they can get hand-wringy articles in SI written about them--how they see or don't see the children regularly; and sentimental video rapprochements, soft-cut for use as pre-Super Bowl boring/tearjerking features.
You watch the sports-sob features; adversity self-imposed or not, well-handled or not. And as you attack the salsa with your Dorito, you're warmed by a sense of membership in the human race.
But Tom Brady just lost Golden Boy status by missing an opportunity to do things the right way.
OK, stuff happens. Guys get sacked, and, apparently, guys need better blocking. But there's more than one reason why they call it "unsafe sex."
Brady is a guy who, if you believe Esquire magazine, has made it a point to avoid situations that look troublesome or scandalous--drug parties, DUIs and all that. Maybe randomly generating the next generation doesn't count as "troublesome" to guys, but it is troubling to this woman, and I'll bet more than just me.
When he's running for president, will I refuse to vote for him because he's fathered a child out of wedlock?
Hell, no (unless he's running as a Republican)--but I'll think twice about it on account of his scooting off to Paris with Gisele Bundchen as the news broke.
What, Kate Moss wasn't available?
Nothing against Gisele; in fact, I know nothing about her, but supermodels in general have a Road to Ruin reputation. There aren't any tall, good-looking young women who aren't a part of that culture?
Or maybe Tom Brady runs in that crowd now. He is approaching JFK Jr. status, too rich and handsome to ignore, but a little bit too much of a plaything to take seriously.
I personally don't think of jetsetters as presidential material; not senatorial or governor material either. Maybe state representative in Rhode Island, or mayor of Providence. We have a tradition, here.
And he does rather fit my image of a CEO, especially one involved in backdating stock options.
Unfortunately, sometimes you just can't play around with the calendar.
My point is, what is unfolding, or should I say, "developing," here is something that may affect Tom Brady's future, long after his football career ends, because what's happening is a reflection on Tom Brady's judgment.
On a personal level, the situation is unfortunate. A baby should be an unadulterated (sorry) cause for joy, and Ms. Moynahan clearly would have wanted circumstances different. We don't know exactly what transpired, nor should we.
Maybe Tom fell for the oldest trick in the spinster-book: Surprise!
Chalk it up to a poor read of the defense.
Or maybe not; that's not our concern. In any case, as the class clown in my junior high school used to say, "It takes two to screw."
Men seem not to connect sex to procreation in the way women do. If you were to give them a written exam on the subject, they would probably know that sex can result in babies, but this academic or intellectual knowledge doesn't seem to seep over to their endocrine systems.
On the one hand, my diversity training teaches me that this is OK, it's all beautiful. Men's minds are how they are and ain't it grand?
But my cultural training--by which I mean, the remaining vestiges of American civilization--teaches me that not making damn sure you don't have unwanted babies, even if you're the guy part of a couple, can be a major mistake.
So, judgment issue number one.
Judgment issue number two is allowing yourself to be observed in Paris with a supermodel while the ex-girlfriend is pregnant and at least looks somewhat abandoned.
This is an image problem in the making, particularly because of the relative perceived gravitas of the two women. Bridget Moynahan has a career considered an eensy bit more serious than modeling. Brady obviously had some sort of a good time with her and, while she is left dealing with the consequences (namely, a family), he is now out cruising Europe with a woman of party-grade octane.
So I am asking myself now, is Brady just unclear on the concept?
He needs to deal with the situation, and not just with money. He needs to deal with it for the sake of his future career, and he needs to deal with it for the image of the NFL, which already has more than enough guys running around seeding the next generation with perp genes.
There needs to be an acceptance of responsibility, and not just financially.
There needs to be a commitment to assuming the role of a father--not a husband, or even a good friend of the mother--but an ongoing presence in the life of the little guy or gal Tom Brady helped create.
How about a little advice for the guys in the locker room?
I'll take the role of unofficial Sports Auntie and say what has to be said: Protection is important.
D'oh! Hey, guys: What's your protection scheme?
I suppose money is pretty decent as a form of birth control, if what you want is to make sure that moms and children are materially well cared for. Pro athletes are spawning kids all over the place and don't have to give a care so long as the right people are paid the right amount.
Then they can get hand-wringy articles in SI written about them--how they see or don't see the children regularly; and sentimental video rapprochements, soft-cut for use as pre-Super Bowl boring/tearjerking features.
You watch the sports-sob features; adversity self-imposed or not, well-handled or not. And as you attack the salsa with your Dorito, you're warmed by a sense of membership in the human race.
But Tom Brady just lost Golden Boy status by missing an opportunity to do things the right way.
OK, stuff happens. Guys get sacked, and, apparently, guys need better blocking. But there's more than one reason why they call it "unsafe sex."
Brady is a guy who, if you believe Esquire magazine, has made it a point to avoid situations that look troublesome or scandalous--drug parties, DUIs and all that. Maybe randomly generating the next generation doesn't count as "troublesome" to guys, but it is troubling to this woman, and I'll bet more than just me.
When he's running for president, will I refuse to vote for him because he's fathered a child out of wedlock?
Hell, no (unless he's running as a Republican)--but I'll think twice about it on account of his scooting off to Paris with Gisele Bundchen as the news broke.
What, Kate Moss wasn't available?
Nothing against Gisele; in fact, I know nothing about her, but supermodels in general have a Road to Ruin reputation. There aren't any tall, good-looking young women who aren't a part of that culture?
Or maybe Tom Brady runs in that crowd now. He is approaching JFK Jr. status, too rich and handsome to ignore, but a little bit too much of a plaything to take seriously.
I personally don't think of jetsetters as presidential material; not senatorial or governor material either. Maybe state representative in Rhode Island, or mayor of Providence. We have a tradition, here.
And he does rather fit my image of a CEO, especially one involved in backdating stock options.
Unfortunately, sometimes you just can't play around with the calendar.
My point is, what is unfolding, or should I say, "developing," here is something that may affect Tom Brady's future, long after his football career ends, because what's happening is a reflection on Tom Brady's judgment.
On a personal level, the situation is unfortunate. A baby should be an unadulterated (sorry) cause for joy, and Ms. Moynahan clearly would have wanted circumstances different. We don't know exactly what transpired, nor should we.
Maybe Tom fell for the oldest trick in the spinster-book: Surprise!
Chalk it up to a poor read of the defense.
Or maybe not; that's not our concern. In any case, as the class clown in my junior high school used to say, "It takes two to screw."
Men seem not to connect sex to procreation in the way women do. If you were to give them a written exam on the subject, they would probably know that sex can result in babies, but this academic or intellectual knowledge doesn't seem to seep over to their endocrine systems.
On the one hand, my diversity training teaches me that this is OK, it's all beautiful. Men's minds are how they are and ain't it grand?
But my cultural training--by which I mean, the remaining vestiges of American civilization--teaches me that not making damn sure you don't have unwanted babies, even if you're the guy part of a couple, can be a major mistake.
So, judgment issue number one.
Judgment issue number two is allowing yourself to be observed in Paris with a supermodel while the ex-girlfriend is pregnant and at least looks somewhat abandoned.
This is an image problem in the making, particularly because of the relative perceived gravitas of the two women. Bridget Moynahan has a career considered an eensy bit more serious than modeling. Brady obviously had some sort of a good time with her and, while she is left dealing with the consequences (namely, a family), he is now out cruising Europe with a woman of party-grade octane.
So I am asking myself now, is Brady just unclear on the concept?
He needs to deal with the situation, and not just with money. He needs to deal with it for the sake of his future career, and he needs to deal with it for the image of the NFL, which already has more than enough guys running around seeding the next generation with perp genes.
There needs to be an acceptance of responsibility, and not just financially.
There needs to be a commitment to assuming the role of a father--not a husband, or even a good friend of the mother--but an ongoing presence in the life of the little guy or gal Tom Brady helped create.
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